Hit the floor

BLACK ROBBERS (A True Story) This has to be one of the best emails I’ve ever read…
For anyone who didn’t see the episode of David Letterman’s show where this
story was told, read this: (And remember it’s a true story…)

On a recent weekend in Atlantic City, a woman won a bucketful of quarters
at a slot machine.

She took a break from the slots for dinner with her husband in the hotel
dining room. But first she wanted to stash the quarters in her room. ‘I’ll
be right back and we’ll go to eat’ she told her husband and carried the
coin-laden bucket to the elevator.

As she was about to walk into the elevator she noticed two men already
aboard. Both were black. One of them was very tall and had an intimidating
figure. The woman froze. Her first thought was: ‘These two are going to rob
me.’

Her next thought was: ‘Don’t be a bigot, they look like perfectly nice
gentlemen.’ But racial stereotypes are powerful, and fear immobilized her.

Avoiding eye contact, she turned around stiffly and faced the elevator
doors as they closed.

A second passed, and then another second, and then another. Her fear
increased! The elevator didn’t move. Panic consumed her.

‘My God’ she thought, I’m trapped and about to be robbed!

Her heart plummeted. Perspiration poured from every pore.

Then one of the men said, ‘Hit the floor.’

Instinct told her to do what they told her.

The bucket of quarters flew upwards as she threw out her arms and collapsed
on the elevator floor. A shower of coins rained down on her.

‘Take my money and spare me’, she prayed.

More seconds passed. She heard one of the men say politely, ‘Ma’am, if
you’ll just tell us what floor you’re going to, we’ll push the button.’

The one who said it had a little trouble getting the words out. He was
trying mightily to hold in a belly laugh. The woman lifted her head and
looked up at the two men. They reached down to help her up.

Confused, she struggled to her feet. ‘When I told my friend here to hit the
floor,’ said the average sized one, I meant that he should hit the elevator
button for our floor. I didn’t mean for you to hit the floor, ma’am.
He spoke genially. He bit his lip. It was obvious he was having a hard time
not laughing The woman thought: ‘My God, what a spectacle I’ve made of myself.’

She was too humiliated to speak. The three of them gathered up the strewn
quarters and refilled her bucket.

When the elevator arrived at her floor they then insisted on walking her to
her room. She seemed a little unsteady on her feet, and they were afraid she
might not make it down the corridor.

At her door they bid her a good evening.

As she slipped into her room she could hear them roaring with laughter as
they walked back to the elevator.

The woman brushed herself off. She pulled herself together and went
downstairs for dinner with her husband.

The next morning flowers were delivered to her room; a dozen roses.

Attached to EACH rose was a crisp one hundred-dollar bill.

The card said: ‘Thanks for the best laugh we’ve had in years.

It was signed: Eddie Murphy & Michael Jordan

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